REVENGE OF THE BLOG!!

“Jesus Wants To Save Christians” by Rob Bell & Don Golden reflection

2011-09-12T17:51:00.000-07:00

The book “Jesus Wants to Save Christians” is broken into seven chapters, focusing on the theological idea of New Exodus and follows the Biblical narrative from Genesis to Revelation. It begins in Genesis with the murder of Able by Cain and God crying out to Cain asking him where he was and telling him that the blood of his brother “cries out to him from the ground.” Bell and Golden then continue with the Exodus of the Israelites out of Egypt to the foot of Mount Sinai where God made known to the Israelites that he needed a physical form on this Earth and that they (the Israelites) would be his priestly nation. That priestly nation then finds a home in Jerusalem but when people find a home they tend to settle and get comfortable. Unfortunately with King Solomon he got so comfortable in his wealth and power that he became like Pharaoh in his oppression of the people (slaves) making the bricks for his temple and palace. He became so comfortable that his harem of wives and concubines turned his heart away from the Lord and to other gods. With God’s promise to hear the cry of the oppressed here the book says, “At the height of their power, Israel misconstrued God’s blessings as favoritism and entitlement. They became indifferent to God and to their priestly calling to bring liberation to others.” The writers go on to say that, the Israelites had forgotten their story and in a word- this is called exile. While in this second exile, the prophets call for the people to reclaim their identity or their story of their first exile and their recommitment to God. The prophet also began “prepare the way” and “make straight the path” to the “second son of David.” The writers say that of all the ways the Gospels could have chosen to write about the coming of Jesus they chose Isaiah and the “announcement of the new exodus”. This “second son of David” the writers say can here the cries of people, all people everywhere. Jesus is here to re-establish the covenant, the marriage, between good and his chosen priestly nation and lead them in this new exodus. Jesus says he is “the way” again a reference to Isaiah. He is on his way to Jerusalem to re-dedicate the temple, he is that temple, and he is a temple greater than anything Solomon could have imagined. This temple is going to be established in a new kingdom and this kingdom is coming soon. Bell and Golden write that this Son of David is not just leading this new exodus for a specific group but for all peoples and new liberation of sorts. He is the great servant the prophets spoke about healing and caring for the poor. Then Jesus is arrested, beaten, and killed as a criminal by a new empire. The writers explain that just before his betrayal and subsequent death just shared a meal like that of the previous exodus. A Passover meal which spared the first born sons of the Israelites in Egypt, but this first born son could not be spared and so he took his body and broke it and he took his blood and he poured it for his disciples and those how would follow him in his exodus. He was broken and poured and the payment God requires for redemption was paid. In the chapter entitled Genital-Free Africans Bell and Golden begin to explain the development of the early church and how difficult this new reality and kingdom really was for the Jewish community of believers who were not even to enter the homes of gentiles let alone minister to them. The chapter begins with Philip and the fact he is a very traditional Jew being confronted by an Ethiopian Eunuch asking about this new reality and kingdom and what he must do to be accepted into this new kingdom. A Gentile asking a Jew for help with entering into the inner temple (Jesus) that has been blocked to Gentile up to this point. The writers continue with the story of Paul who continues to break down these walls of Gentile and Jew by taking Jesus commission and spreading this new exodus “to the ends of the earth.” In chapters five through the end to of the book, the writers change their flow a bit and direct their writing towards the reader. The writers engage the reader by calling out the fact that we live in a new empire, America, which in many ways can be viewed as a modern day ancient Egypt, Babylon, or Rome. They engage with the reader by forcing them into seeing America as a modernized version of Solomon’s Israel. America is a modern day Canaan filled with flowing Milk and Honey but we have become comfortable and we sometimes do not hear the cry of the oppressed, which is what got Israel into trouble with the Lord. We as community that claims they love the Lord and follow him must realize that we are abusing the blessing that God has given us, by not sharing with the oppressed of this world. Bell and Golden then reference John the exiled on Patmos and his writing to his church in revelation and how it is a call to civil disobedience and the rejection of the system that tends to drown out the cry of the oppressed. The writers believe that the only way for the church to be an effective tool of the kingdom is to be “Broken and Poured” like the “first born son” the “Son of David” and that they say is a manifesto.
This book did a number on me. I find myself with a lack of motivation and a burnt out spirit after being unemployed with out a college degree in a church that really was not feeding me and doing youth ministry to kids and parents who did not find it necessary to find a way of inviting outsiders to come and enjoy this kingdom. This book reignited my fire but it also rather scared me. I have to come to terms with the fact that I am very blessed one for being an American, two that I have the opportunity to gain and education, and three the fact that I can have at least one square meal let alone three. I feel like I have lost my ear to the call of the oppressed and if I am to look at my life and not be thrown into exile I need to find a way for me to come to terms with the oppressed. This books idea of a new exodus as a means for ministering is brilliant to me and I need to know more about it. I have read two other Bell books and both were fascinating and I need to read them very thoughtfully or I could get lost in his words and the same for this book. I am a fan of Bell’s writing no matter if people believe him to be a heretic.
For me it was the last chapter that I found most useful the epilogue. It burned through me like a wild fire. Some may say that I have a pride problem and most of the time they are right. If I am truly a minister of God in this new kingdom this new reality then I, like Jesus and his disciple, must be ‘Broken and Poured’, I must be willing to not only hear the cry of the oppressed but I also must be ready to answer the cry of the oppressed. I have a responsibility to myself and my community to preach and teach this message.
My question for the book and the writers would be how do we reconcile the fact that America does do a massive amount of aide to other countries in the wake of disasters, famines, drought, war, and even genocide but the massive churches including the Mars Hill church that Bell is the head of do some aide but their building are so of incredible size and cost? I feel that smaller churches may not be able to do as much work because of their funds just are not there but they still do much work in their community. All in all the writers did do a great job calling out the church and it members but it seems that these massive churches pay more to keep their building going than they do in their own communities.

An Idiots Guide to Theology: Soteriology

2010-04-06T22:26:00.000-07:00

The Paradox of the Cross
First Corinthians 1:18 says, “For the word of the cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” (Holy Bible: English Standard Version 2002) For mankind death is a point of inevitability, yet death is not part of God’s original plans. There is evidence of this in the verse in John chapter 11 that says “Jesus wept” this is not just Jesus crying over his dead friend, but Jesus is crying over the whole of mankind and its disconnect of God’s original plan. God’s plan is then reconnected with mans inevitable demise through the death of God himself. Jesus Christ was put to death on a cross but in doing so he took on the sin of the world that would condemn man and crushes it securing salvation for them. So in this one act of sacrifice the cross is death and salvation wrapped into one moment. Hugh of St. Victor said this on the death and salvation of Christ, “He (Jesus) did this so that the redemption to be offered might have a connection is us, through its being taken fro what is ours. We are truly made to be partakers in this redemption if we are united through faith to the redeemer who has entered into fellowship with us through his flesh. Now human nature had become corrupted by sin, and had this become liable to condemnation on its account. But grace came, and chose some from the mass of humanity through mercy for salvation, while it allowed others to remain for condemnation through justice.” (McGrath 2007) Again through this symbol of death those who have fellowship with the Christ find grace, mercy, and salvation. Hastings Rashdall said this of the crucifixion, “The atoning efficacy of Christ’s work is not limited to death. The whole life of Christ, the whole revelation of God which is constituted by that life, excites the love of man, moves his gratitude, shows him what God would have him be, enables him to be in his imperfect way what Christ alone was perfectly, and so make at-one-ment, restores between God and man the union which sin has destroyed.” (McGrath 2007) Dorothee Sölle says in his writing on Suffering and Redemption that, “The cross is either a ‘metaphysic of punitive death,’ that is from the perspective of the God who ordains suffering who finally has a chance to complete Abraham’s sacrifice, or it is a ‘mysticism of consolation for death,’ which people receive for their own suffering and dying view of the cross. But the cross is neither a symbol expressing the relationship between God the Father and his Son nor a symbol of masochism which needs suffering in order to convince itself of love. It is above all a symbol of reality, Love does not ‘require’ the cross, but de facto it ends up on the cross. De facto Jesus of Nazareth was crucified; de facto the crosses of the rebellious slaves under Spartacus adorned the streets of the Roman Empire.” (McGrath 2007) The cross is a work of man for death, the cross became a place of glory for Jesus, and God transformed the death on the cross to a life-bearing symbol requiring fellowship.

Works Cited
McGrath, Alister E. The Chrstian Theology Reader. Oxford: Blackwell Publishing, 2007.

An Idiots Guide to Theology: Christology

2010-04-06T08:43:00.000-07:00

Jesus’ Glory
Jesus’ glory takes two forms in the Gospels the first is the glory that he reflects back to God the Father that people praise him for but the glory given him was in God the Father’s will so that he may be revealed to them. The second is when God the Father chooses to glorify the God the Son, this glory being death on a cross that is described in the Gospel of John.
The first type of glory looks and sounds like this, John 14:8-11 says, “Philip said to him, "Lord, show us the Father, and it is enough for us. "Jesus said to him, "Have I been with you so long, and you still do not know me, Philip? Whoever has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, 'Show us the Father'? Do you not believe that I am in the Father and the Father is in me? The words that I say to you I do not speak on my own authority, but the Father who dwells in me does his works. Believe me that I am in the Father and the Father is in me, or else believe on account of the works themselves.” (Holy Bible: English Standard Version, 2002) Through out the Gospel of John Jesus is revealed as having a deep connection with the Father even through out his ministry on Earth, Jesus always pointing the glory given him to the power and majesty back to God the Father. Earlier in the book of John after coming to Lazarus’ tomb Jesus must again explain himself according to God’s glory the Gospel writer writes, “Then Jesus said, "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?" So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, "Father, I thank you that you have heard me. I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me." John 11:40-42. (Holy Bible: English Standard Version, 2002) Finally in John 17:1-5 it says that Jesus prays this about his glory and the glory that belongs to the Father, “Father, the hour has come; glorify your Son that the Son may glorify you, since you have given him authority over all flesh, to give eternal life to all whom you have given him. And this is eternal life that they know you the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent. I glorified you on earth, having accomplished the work that you gave me to do. And now, Father, glorify me in your own presence with the glory that I had with you before the world existed.” From this we see that Jesus glorified the Father through the works that he did here on earth so that people would believe. Second we see Jesus praying that the time for the second type of glory to be his and the God the father would glorify him. In a daily commentary online we find a new definition of Glory. “John has hinted throughout his gospel that Jesus would redefine glory. The word for exalt or glorify actually means to lift up on high. For Jesus, his glory will involve his being lifted up on high on the Cross out of love for us and in obedience to God. He will bring the Father glory by fulfilling the Father's plan to bring us out of our bondage to sin and death through his death, burial and resurrection” (Heartlight, 2001)

Works Cited
Heartlight. (2001). Retrieved March 2010 from A new Definition of Glory: http://www.heartlight.org/wjd/john/0917-wjd.html

An Idiots Guide to Theology: Pneumatology

2010-04-06T08:40:00.000-07:00

Divinity of the Holy Spirit
Scripture points to the idea that the Spirit was with God in the beginning in Genesis 1:1-2 it says “In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was without form and void, and darkness was over the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters.” (English Standard Version Genesis 1:1-2) (The Holy Bible: English Standard Version) pointing to the idea that the Spirit has been around from at least the beginning Origen says “Up to the present time, we have been able to find no statement in Holy Scripture in which the Holy Spirit could be said to be made or created—not even in the way in which we have shown above that the Divine Wisdom is spoken of by Solomon.” (Origen) Origen is pointing to the idea that God the Father and God the son and God the spirit are all one entity but able to move independently but all remaining Divine. Origen goes on to say later in his writing, “Let no one indeed suppose that we . . . give a preference to the Holy Spirit over the Father and the Son, or assert that His dignity is greater, which certainly would be a very illogical conclusion.” (Origen)
Assuming that the Bible is the inspired word of God some logical questions are raised with how the words were inspired and what the catalyst was that spurred on the writing. I argue that the inspiration was carried to the prophets and the writers through the Spirit of the Lord or The Holy Spirit. Athenagoras writes, “The Holy Spirit Himself, who operates in the prophets, we assert to be an effluence of God, flowing from Him, and returning back again like a beam of the sun.”(Athenagoras) In his writing Athenagoras poses the idea that the Holy Spirit is a part of God that moves between God in the heavens and the creatures of the Earth. This pointing back to the idea that God in heaven in the beginning and then back to his Spirit hovering of the waters of the void. The Holy Spirit plays a major role in God blessing his son while Jesus is on Earth again moving between the two plains “Now when all the people were baptized, and when Jesus also had been baptized and was praying, the heavens were opened, and the Holy Spirit descended on him in bodily form, like a dove; and a voice came from heaven, "You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased.”(Luke 3:21-22) This begins the connection that Christ has with the Holy Spirit. “The source of the entire Holy Spirit remains in Christ, so that from Him could be drawn streams of gifts and works, while the Holy Spirit dwelled richly in Christ.”(Novatian). Finally Augustine argues a point of dependence of the three parts. Augustine says, “If any bodes exist which cannot be severed or divided in any way, they must still consist of their parts or they would not be bodies. Part and whole are related terms, since every part belongs to some whole, and the whole is whole on account of its totality of parts. But since the body part and whole, these exist not only as mutually related terms but as substances.” (Alister) Since the Holy Spirit is part of the whole it is part of God it is safe to assume according to Augustine that the Holy Spirit is as divine, since God is fully divine the Holy Spirit is full divine.

Works Cited
Athenagoras (c. 175, E), 2.133.

Alister, E. McGrath. The Chrstian Theology Reader. Oxford: Blackwell Publishing, 2007.

Origen (c. 225, E), 4.253.

Origen (c. 225, E), 4.254, 255.

Novatian (c. 235, W), 5.641.

An Idiots Guide to Theology: Eschatology

2010-04-06T08:38:00.000-07:00

The Restoration in the End Times
In the book of Revelation the apostle John speaks of a new heaven and a new earth becoming one, a restoration of the old into the new. John writes, “Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away."(Revelation 21:1-4) This passage shows the idea that in the end times there will be a restoration of all creation. The old is passing away but a new creation is found coming form heaven unto earth. Some may argue that the new creation that John writes about is Jesus entering to Earth, which is completely reasonable yet what if John is speaking of the second coming of Christ and the new creation that he brings is for everyone who calls upon the Lord. The prophet Joel talks about this in his writings, “And I will show wonders in the heavens and on the earth, blood and fire and columns of smoke. The sun shall be turned to darkness, and the moon to blood, before the great and awesome day of the LORD comes. And it shall come to pass that everyone who calls on the name of the LORD shall be saved. For in Mount Zion and in Jerusalem there shall be those who escape, as the LORD has said, and among the survivors shall be those whom the LORD calls.”(Joel 2:30) In 2nd Corinthians the writer says, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” (2 Corinthians 5:17) Alister McGrath uses a passage from Irenaeus’ book “Against Heresies” to point out the restoration of creation that must happen so that God can enter into this plane of existence. Irenaeus says, “For God is rich in all things and all things are his (Romans 10:12). Therefore this created order must be restored to its first condition and be made subject to the righteousness without hindrance; and this Apostle shows in the Epistle to the Romans, when he says, The earnest expectation of the creation awaits the revelation of the sons of God (Romans 8:19-21)” (McGrath) For God to enter back into this creation it needs to be redone. The first coming of Christ was the catalyst for the end times and for God to come again but the next time all of creation will be redone not just those who call upon the Lord.

Work Cited
McGrath, Alister E. The Chrstian Theology Reader. Oxford: Blackwell Publishing, 2007.

An Idiots Guide to Theology: Anthropology

2010-04-06T08:36:00.000-07:00

God in the Image of Man
Often in our search for God we try to define him, we try to personify him with words that make Him (i.e. Him) more human. But if we look to scripture we see that God is more like intangible things, in scripture it describes God as Love, Jealous, Light, and the Logos. These are not human physical qualities like the picture of an old man with a great beard and lightening bolts in his hand but rather I would say these are more like ideas. In reality to really understand the nature of God we need to understand the nature of man and how he responds to God.
The duelist view of man is the idea that there is a physical man and an ideal or immaterial form somewhere in the land of ideas. But if we look to scripture we find that we are all soul and all man/woman. In class it was described in this way. “The soul is something that is part of us. We are a unitary whole that can be viewed from different angles. The idea that the soul is a separate entity that is disconnected from our bodies this idea comes from classic Greek dualism, which draws from Plato. Rene Descartes brings this into the for front of philosophical theology leaving a distinct divide between matter and spirit.” But there just could not be a division between our souls and ourselves because there is something that draws us in on the teachings of Christ and I believe that if our soul and our bodies are disconnected that personal draw just would not be there. Thomas Aquinas described our connection with God as follows “When we are trying to order our desires we need to remind ourselves of our orientation of our goals. Every aspect of our lives need to love God. And if we set these as our goals we shall be good.” With each generation we begin to look at God through the lens of that generational cultural phenomenon and the God of that generation, but today we are slowly coming to the realization that we are historical beings. Again in our notes there is an explanation of this that I find very helpful, “The post modern world has not caught up with the idea that we are historical beings. Much of post modernism is modernism warmed over, yet as post moderns we realize that we are historical beings we will have a huge shift in all parts of our culture. Most philosophers are being challenged with the ideas that we see all things through our own lenses of our history. Our identities are constituted by our traditions, or histories.” Later on in class we discussed the ideas that Paul posses in Ephesians, “we are created in God’s image but we are corrupted by our sin in Ephesians it talks about our lives as children of wrath like the rest of mankind. Paul later talks in Ephesians about were greedy to practice every kind of impunity throw off that life and be renewed in the spirit of your minds and to put on the new self created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.” What we need to do as faithful beings is construct our ideas of God in new ways but recognizing that many ideas and traditions about God have come from the past and we can ride those waves into the present.

my Annual Five Iron New Year's Post

2010-01-16T22:56:00.000-08:00

It's New Years Eve and I'm full of empty promises, I half pretend to keep this time, just like last year. The band is loud and I'm wandering the shadows, wishing I was never here. I persevere. A crowded room, these whitewashed tombs, they raise their glasses high, they kiss the past goodbye.

This New Years Eve, I'm waiting for tomorrow. My heart is on my sleeve, and yes I still believe, this New Years Eve, will turn out better than before, I'm holding on, still holding out, until they close the door... on me.

It's New Years Eve and I feel my insecurities, are haunting me like ghosts, this sinking quicksand. And then with thunderous praise and lofty adoration, a second passes by, yet nothing changes. I hate my skin, this grave I'm standing in. Another change of years, and I wish I wasn't here.

A year goes by and I'm staring at my watch again, and I dig deep this time, for something greater than I've ever been, life to ancient wineskins. And I was blind but now I see.

This New Years Eve, something must change me inside, I'm crooked and misguided, and tired of being tired. This New Years Eve, I'm waiting for tomorrow. My heart is on my sleeve, and yes I still believe, in You.

This last year was a doozy I had to leave one of the most important places in my life where I made some of the closest friends of my life and met the greatest girl ever and have fallen for her. I moved to OK for a school year that seems to drag on. Friends are getting married left and right its crazy. I am in a slump in life I know I must just keep trudging along in order to make it to my final goal. Yes I Still Believe In You. that line keeps me going and sometimes its He is the only thing keeping me going. I love you Jesus you are my Samwise and I am your Frodo, please carry me when I fall.

Pray Hard and Hold on to Jesus folks
love ya.

break from the "Guide"

2009-07-20T12:23:00.001-07:00

This is not my work and by no means am I trying to steal or claim it is an original work of my own but what I want to show is more evidence as to why everyone should pay attention to what this man of "Change" is saying and doing.

June 15, 2009
Our Historically Challenged President
by Victor Davis Hanson
Tribune Media Services

In his speech last week in Cairo, President Obama proclaimed he was a "student of history." But despite Barack Obama's image as an Ivy-League-educated intellectual, he lacks historical competency, both in areas of facts and interpretation.

This first became apparent during the presidential campaign. Candidate Obama proclaimed then that during World War II his great-uncle had helped liberate Auschwitz, and that his grandfather knew fellow American troops that had entered Auschwitz and Treblinka.

Both are impossible. The Americans didn't free either Nazi death camp. (Regarding Obama's great uncle's war experience, the Obama team later said he'd meant the camp at Buchenwald.)

Much of what Obama said to thousands of Germans during his Victory Column speech in Berlin last summer was also ahistorical. He began, "I know that I don't look like the Americans who've previously spoken in this great city." He apparently forgot that for the prior eight years, the official faces of American foreign policy in Germany were Secretaries of State Colin Powell and Condoleezza Rice — both African-Americans.

In the same speech, Obama seemed to suggest that the world had come together to save Berlin during the Airlift. In fact, it was almost an entirely American and British effort — written off by most observers as hopeless and joined only by a handful of Western allies when the improbable lift looked like it might succeed.

In the recent Cairo speech, Obama's historical allusions were even more suspect. Almost every one of his references was either misleading or incomplete. He suggested that today's Middle East tension was fed by the legacy of European colonialism and the Cold War that had reduced nations to proxies.

But the great colonizers of the Middle East were the Ottoman Muslims, who for centuries ruled with an iron fist. The 20th-century movements of Baathism, Pan-Arabism and Nasserism — largely homegrown totalitarian ideologies — did far more damage over the last half-century to the Middle East than the legacy of European colonialism.

Obama also claimed that "Islam . . . carried the light of learning through so many centuries, paving the way for Europe's Renaissance and Enlightenment." While medieval Islamic culture was impressive and ensured the survival of a few classical texts — often through the agency of Arabic-speaking Christians — it had little to do with the European rediscovery of classical Greek and Latin values. Europeans, Chinese and Hindus, not Muslims, invented most of the breakthroughs Obama credited to Islamic innovation.

Much of the Renaissance, in fact, was more predicated on the centuries-long flight of Greek-speaking Byzantine scholars from Constantinople to Western Europe to escape the aggression of Islamic Turks. Many romantic thinkers of the Enlightenment sought to extend freedom to oppressed subjects of Muslim fundamentalist rule in eastern and southern Europe.

Obama also insisted that "Islam has a proud tradition of tolerance. We see it in the history of Andalusia and Cordoba during the Inquisition." Yet the Spanish Inquisition began in 1478; by then Cordoba had long been re-conquered by Spanish Christians, and was governed as a staunchly Christian city.

In reference to Iraq, President Obama promised that "no system of government can or should be imposed upon one nation by any other." Is he unaware of how the United States imposed democracies after World War II?

After the defeat of German Nazism, Italian fascism and Japanese militarism, Americans — by force — insisted that these nations adopt democratic governments, for their own sakes and the world's. Indeed, it is hard to think of too many democratic governments that did not emerge from violence — including our own.

Obama also stated: "For centuries, black people in America suffered the lash of the whip as slaves and the humiliation of segregation. But it was not violence that won full and equal rights."

With all due respect to our president, this assertion is again not fully accurate. The only thing that ended slavery in the United States was the Civil War, which saw some 600,000 Americans — the vast majority of them white — lost in a violent struggle to ensure that nearly half the country would not remain a slave-owning society. Also, the massive urban riots of the 1960s and 1970s were certainly violent.

This list of distortions could be easily expanded. President Obama, in elegant fashion, may casually invoke the means of politically correct history for the higher ends of contemporary reconciliation. But it is a bad habit. Eloquence and good intentions exempt no one from the truth of the past — President Obama included.

©2009 Tribune Media Services

An Idiot's Guide to Theology: God's Wrath

2009-06-19T14:58:00.001-07:00

The wrath of God according to this idiot is actually just the brokenness of this world displayed in the darkness that covers it. In the Gospel of John the theme of the light referring to Jesus and the darkness the brokenness of the world are reoccurring and are kind of the direction of these thoughts. Let me explain; if someone is in the world they are in the darkness, then Jesus came down and he is the Light the darkness flees from him. But soon the Jesus had to leave this world to prepare the coming kingdom but he did leave us with the light. But this world is still broken so darkness still dwells in it, but since darkness can not remain in the light it is not as broken within us, but if someone is to reject the light within them they remain in darkness, so if someone chooses darkness they choose brokenness and since God can not abide in brokenness his peace and comfort are not there. So it is reasonable to say God's wrath is really just the brokenness of the world tearing itself apart and is not really apart of God at all. So the darkness is displayed in the broken, sinful world we live.
If we look to scripture especially in the Old Testament we see time and time again the people God had chosen turning away from him, their stronghold, their fortress, their light in this broken world, they turn to darkness a place where God can not abide and they are pummeled into a pulp until someone wh9o had remain in the light carries them home again. many times the Bible talks about God as a jealous God wanting only to have his children turn back to him, because he could not go where they wanted to go.
finally if one is to look to our history, not one hundred years ago one of the worlds most devastating atrocities in all of recorded history the Holocaust took place many people ask "where was God during that..?" My response is: He wasn't, he cold not abide in the darkness of war and genocide, but still there were some who relied completely on Him who despite the fact they would die for it they held on. Others thank God for survival others curse him for both. Even today atrocities around the world are happening but it is not God's fault for them happening but the brokenness of this world
God's wrath is not something he does but something out of his control it is displayed in the broken darkness of this world and God can not aide in such darkness.

Break from Idiot's Guide...

2009-06-17T12:15:00.000-07:00

so i grew up with a single mom and i wasn't very good at sports but this kid needs real friends not just his mom poor kid...

An Idoiot's Guide to Theology: Disclaimer

2009-06-16T23:31:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: These are just my ramblings and ideas that roll around in the ole' noggin and don't necessarily reflect that of the entire Christian Community in fact I bet most Christians will disagree with me and probably condemn me for the posts...but that is why I have called this series of posts An Idiot's Guide cause I am an idiot and well I can admit when i don't fully know something but i try and so if I were the reader I would keep that in mind and I would keep it open as well. Yeah that is about it for the disclaimer. - Spencer (the Idiot)

An Idiots Guide to Theology: What is the Church?

2009-06-16T23:22:00.001-07:00

What I believe the church is, is a body of believers striving to find definition and hoping on the ideas of a radical leader and social outcast. The church is an extension of the life and the ideas set forth by this radical teacher, who then died for his cause. The church is a place where that life is shared in the minds and hearts of people who believe this radicals teaching. The church is not a place or a location but a living being. It is a being with emotion, full of life, and vitality. We can see this for in the fact that it is timeless. From the churches humble beginnings in houses to the massive churches and then back to the houses, in all shapes and forms the church is ever-moving and ever changing, and if it were to stop true church would stop. The church that was set up was to be this way. It is a persons desire to be in communion with this radical teacher, not so much on a specific doctrine that he was teaching but more of the general ideals that he set forth. I believe often times it is the doctrine arguments that are really just specific traditions to specific institutions and places of worship. With the arguments about tradition our worship and gathering and sharing in the good community set up by this radical become very convoluted and are not necessarily unheard but are not as strong as when a church body is in good communion with one another. On Early Church writer said that the church is the pure bride of Christ, although it is a beautiful thought, when that belief goes to far it will slow the progress of the church and will make it an uninviting institution. An opposite opinion was that it was a place of bridge building between the followers and the people outside the teachings, again a wonderful thought if let to go too far the church could be infected by ideals that are not in synch with the teachings of the radical leader. Like I said before the church is a living entity that does not waver with time but rather flows with the waves of time.

An Idiots Guide to Theology: Whats the Point?

2009-06-16T23:15:00.000-07:00

I believe the purpose of this life is to live simply in love. I am not fully sure how to explain simple love but I will try; in scripture while in conversation with some scholars Jesus gets posed with the question of what the greatest commandment is, Jesus’ response was “Love God, and equally important is Love Your Neighbor. These two commandments have so much deep meaning and many a sermon have been preached on each. However, I believe these to be the simplest commands in the Bible. God wants us to love, simply love. We use this word so loosely in the English language but in other languages, there are multiple different ways to say Love. What I believe the love Jesus and the writers were referring to were the simple love of a child, a child’s love is so simple but is more genuine than any other love to be found on this Earth. We can all recognize this love, it is unconditional and unmeasured, the love for the parent by the child is unmatched by any love, the only thing that could challenge it is the love of a parent for the child but that love has been corrupted by time and age. This love is genuine, it is pure, and most of all it is simple. Our lives are to be simple, and through the simplicity of life we gain the complex understanding of the grand spectrum of life. The narrative explains that God is love. In addition, if we are to participate in loving someone, or God himself we are participating in continuity with God. With the act of Christ’s glorification on the cross Jesus participated in the deepest act of love in laying down his life of us. So if we participate in the death of Christ we participate in his love.

An Idiot's Guide to Theology: Where does Knowledge Come From?

2009-06-10T16:31:00.000-07:00

What is the basis of our knowledge?

I think it is unfair to base all of our knowledge on one single catalyst. I believe it is based on three things. God's revelation to man through his son Jesus or through the Bible, we should also base it on Reason, reason through wisdom or shared experience, and finally upon tradition, by tradition i mean cultural tradition.
The first of these I said was God's revelation, I believe that revelation is a very important aspect of having knowledge. I believe God expresses the things God thinks are most important, he used his son Jesus as an ambassador to earth on his behalf, to show us how to live the gospel, whether or not his son's life and death on the cross did something for us spiritually is a different question, but what his life did show us was how to live a fruitful life. His life expressed in what we call the Bible and although there are is an argument as to whether or not certain other gospels should be added, Jesus' life still shows us how to live. Another avenue one can go in with revelation is when God reveals something to someone outside of the Bible, an experience in which an answer or new idea is given to a person by the will of God. This is interesting because I believe this happens at many turning points in Church History from the Early Fathers to the Papal decrees to Luther and his ideas of Justification by faith to the Stone-Campbell movement where restoration and unity were main themes. In one way or another these ideas were revealed to them through scripture. These ideas don't break open cannon of anything but they do ask question and pose answers that are interpretations of what they have studied for a lifetime.
The second of the standards is Reason. I say it is just as important because I believe this kind of keeps revelation in check.If something someone says is a revelation a rationalist will pick apart the revelationalists argument and if it can withstand that both revelation and reason are used to enhance thought.When I thing of Reason I can not help but think to King Solomon. When God asked him waht he wanted most he requested wisdom, the ability to reason through an issue and give the best answer. he did not ask for divine revelation he already had from his historical tradtion, but he asked to be able to discern truth. But reason can go to far as well and pride and reason do not mix, it leads to a very mechanical way of life.
And so, with the other two comes cultural tradition. This would be looking back into history and picking apart what other people have said and questioning it and looking to what others have said about what we have pulled apart. We have to remember what we are not the first to ask these questions, this keeps us humbled in out journey for knowledge.
I believe in a checks and balance system for the standard in which I seek knowledge because I do not think one way can get all of the information we need to begin to answer theological questions. I think that is where many young, new and old theologians get stuck by having one standard of knowledge instead of trusting others.
That my take on things. I do not claim t know anything really in fact would say I dont know much at all. But I do my best to understand.

Learnin' to Fly

2009-04-10T00:35:00.000-07:00

Well I started out down a dirty r oad
Started out all alone
And the sun went down as I crossed the hill
The town lit up the world got still

I’m learning to fly but I ain’t got wings
Comin’ down is the hardest thing

Well the good old days may not return
And the rocks might melt, and the sea may burn

I’m learning to fly but I ain’t got wings
Comin’ down is the hardest thing

Well some say life will beat you down
Break your heart, steal your crown
So I started out for God kno ws where
But I guess I’ll know when I get there

I’m learning to fly around the clouds
But what goes up must come down

I’m learning to fly but I ain’t got wings
Comin’ down is the hardest thing
I’m learning to fly around the clouds
But what goes up must come down

I’m learning to fly
I’m learning to fly

This i have learned in my time of being on my own and doing the school thing. we're all learning to fly. No matter our age. I just love this song. Its just great.

new song thought

2009-02-03T02:14:00.000-08:00

In the cross, in the cross,
Be my glory ever;
Till my raptured soul shall find
Rest beyond the river.

Near the cross, a trembling soul,
Love and mercy found me;
There the bright and morning star
Sheds its beams around me.

In the cross, in the cross,
Be my glory ever;
Till my raptured soul shall find
Rest beyond the river.

Near the cross! O Lamb of God,
Bring its scenes before me;
Help me walk from day to day,
With its shadows o’er me.

In the cross, in the cross,
Be my glory ever;
Till my raptured soul shall find
Rest beyond the river.

Near the cross I’ll watch and wait
Hoping, trusting ever,
Till I reach the golden strand,
Just beyond the river.

In the cross, in the cross,
Be my glory ever;
Till my raptured soul shall find
Rest beyond the river.

So we sang this song in Chapel today and it really struck me.
Not many songs now-a-days do much for me, there are a couple
but not many. I sometimes forget how much power is in the cross
i am reminded that the glory of our salvation,the glory of our King,
and the glory of our new Kingdom is found in the cross. That is all i
got on this one.
Pray hard and hold one to Jesus...or the cross

Dear Readers,

2008-10-29T02:48:00.001-07:00

Today starts the beginning of a new style of blogging. I start with this, it is a pledge to you the readers, to my fellow students, to the faculty and staff of Cascade College. I refuse to let this mystical place die. I pledge with all my heart, strength, and mind to do everything in my power and the strength God will provide to save this place. 15 years ago upon this plot of earth Cascade College came to be. After 15 years according to people with check books it has ran its course. This is my time to be pissed so deal with it. But i see some thing different I see the Cade bursting into flames, and out of it a Phoenix will rise and join the ranks of the other Christian colleges and Universities. The words Goad used to comfort us on monday were beautiful, but i do not see cascade as a dying Hezekiah (i spelled that first try with out looking, see what we learn here). I see the story of Lot in Sodom and Gomorrah, we can change God's mind. Abraham went back and forth between God and the cities to find holy men. Well I have decided to take the position of Abraham, i have been pray and showing God the good, and fruitful things Cascade has to offer. I am praying specifically for Him to change his mind. I have a plan to save this place, all i ask is for you to stand with me. My friends i am going to need you more than ever, my colleagues here at cascade i am going to call on you in ways you think are harsh, i beg you please stand with me, and finally the staff and faculty all i ask from you i a prayerful mind and your love and compassion. thats all i got. i love you all.

these words are now more significant than any other time in my life...

Pray Hard and Hold On to Jesus.

forever and ever Amen.

Monasteries and Taxes

2008-10-21T17:48:00.000-07:00

So today has been an odd day, the two things that have been floating around the old nogin are the taxes i have to get and fill out the whole fafsa thing and The early church in the 4th and 5th centuries. i dont have any philosophical thought today i just wanted to share the things on my mind. it is 5:51 right now and well im bored and i dont want to have to fill out my fafsa. Also i got to go home for the weekend...which it turns out is far more stressful than anything else, dont get me wrong i loved seeing everyone and usually i am refreshed after returning home but i just have a heightened irratiblity right now. usually i feel bottlecaps about this place (see http://hisnameisspencer.blogspot.com/2007/08/cade.html for that reference) but this time i am just washed out. i must now grudgingly go do my fafsa stuff

pray hard and hold on to Jesus

Justin Martyr...

2008-10-16T22:27:00.000-07:00

is the man. So i may be a huge nerd or i may be just expanding in my knowledge of the early church fathers. But i know for sure that this guy is awesome. Although his thoughts on bringing the lost to Christ are a bit out there with his "bridge building" ideals i find myself in accordance with him on many of his writings. "He was schooled as a philosopher, studying under a Stoic, an Aristotelian, a Pythagorean, and a Platonist, until he met an old man who in Socratic method raised questions only the "Christian Philosophy" could answer." Everett Ferguson's Church History V.1. I Justin's second Apology he states "Whatever things were rightly said among all men are the property of us Christians." I love the way that sounds all things that are truths of this world (look out Post-Moderns) yes truths are property given to us by the Risen Son of God the Father creator of all things. Epic thought.

thats all i got for now i must get back to writing my paper on this guy.

peace.

and may the force be with you....
but mostly with me.

Check It, Yo!

2008-10-13T22:01:00.001-07:00

So heres the thing, <---(lets be honest thats better than "dear")

right. so my lasts post was in May...im super lame, there is so very much i can tell you yet i dont think that my words can rightly explain everything that has happened this summer. From leaving for P-town at the beginning of June and not being home in like 5 months, to the incredible yet exhausting summer at PSP (just ask me about it), being homeless for two weeks, living in a tent at a friends bosses house, to coming back to the Cade. It has been one of the most wonderful summers i have ever had. The people i met, the relationships that have flurished and the relationships that have come to be. But now is the time to just reflect. Its already fall break here at the Cade and i have so much homework to do (which i have most of it done). I miss the people i met this summer, Raleigh, and Jess, Josh and katina...there rest of you fools i see on a fairly regular basis so dont whine. God has roughed up my life this summer...this year really, giving me so much to think on and try and put into practice. And i know im not good at it and that i have failed in a lot of ways but i am still working on it still striving to be living for the God who created all things. The biggest thing is that suffering even to the point of death is the real definition of glory, Jesus was in his full Glory when he was on the cross. We here in the states dont know what suffering is and well i think that makes us soft. Dont get me wrong i dont think that we need mass persecutions like in the early church but i feel we need to constantly challenge our selves in what we believe and re-organize our thoughts even if the out come is the same we need to challenge ourselves. its so late and i am still up i want to go to bed but im also very hungry...lame so i am peaceing out. so to all those out in there in cyberland good night and God speed.

Revenge of the blog

2008-05-29T14:53:00.000-07:00

So I havent posted a real blog in a while. Even thought Jerms girlfriend creeper believe that my previous posts are real blogs I disagree. But alas I am back and I am going to do my best to stay on top of things. This week I got the official word that I am a PUMP intern. I am so excited to be there and in a place I love with people I love and doing something that God is calling me too. Although I have made some pretty cool friends this time of being home.I am going back to P-town on the 6th of June to have a little time to spend with friends that are up there before we start the hardcore summer of PUMP kids. I have retitled this Blog as you may have noticed to give it a new beginning. So thats all for now folks if anything interesting happens I will be here to blog.

May the Force be with you
...but mostly with me.

so haven't posted in a while

2008-04-30T16:34:00.001-07:00

* You are not Ansel Adams
* Neither are you Herb Ritz
* Automatic Cameras - Aren't
* Auto Focus - won't
* If you can't remember, you left the film at home
* No photo assignment remains unchanged after the first day of shooting
* When in doubt, motor out
* If a photo shoot goes too smoothly, then the lab will lose the film
* If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid
* Success occurs when no one is looking, failure occurs when the Client is watching
* The most critical roll of film is fogged
* If you forgot, then you did not rewind the film
* Photo Assistants are essential, they give photographers someone to yell at
* The one item (batteries, film, and ect.) you need is always in short supply
* Interchangeable parts aren't
* Long life batteries only last for a couple of rolls
* Weather never cooperates
* Everything always works in your home, everything always fails on location
* For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism
* The newest and least experienced photographer will usually win the Pulitzer
* Every instruction given to a lab, which can be misunderstood, will be
* There is always a way, and it usually doesn't work
* Never tell the Photo Editor you have nothing to do
* Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't
* No photojournalist is well dressed
* No well dressed photographer is a photojournalist
* Professional photographers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs
* The nature shots invariably happen on two occasions:
-when animals are ready.
-when you're not.
* Same rule just substitute children
* Client Intelligence is a contradiction
* There is no such thing as a perfect shoot
* The important things are always simple
* The simple things are always hard
* Flashes will fail as soon as you need them
* A clean (and dry) camera is a magnet for dust, mud and moisture
* Photo experience is something you never get until just after you need it
* The self-importance of a client is inversely proportional to his position in the hierarchy (as is his deviousness and mischievousness)
* The lens that falls is always the most expensive.
* when you drop a lens cap, the inside part always lands face down in the mud.
* Bugs always want to land on the mirror during a lens swap.
* Your batteries will always go dead or you will need to put in a new film canister at the least opportune moment.
* Your batteries will always go dead during a long exposure (so with the shutter open).
* When you shoot the night away and never have to stop. Your film did not roll on to the take up reel.
Sent by Les Benton
* Camera are designed with a built-in sensor, that senses the anticipation to develop the film.
When the level of anticipation is highest, this sensor causes the back to flip open exposing the film.
Sent by Takura Razemba
* Lenses are attracted back to their source - hard rocks.
Corollary:
The more expensive the lens, the greater the attraction.
* No matter how long you've had a convention for marking film holders, you will forget it - when exposing the once-in-a-lifetime shot.
* Safelights - aren't.
* The greater a photographer's excitement, the greater its chance of fogging film, scratching prints, and deleting files.
* The success of an assignment is inversely proportional to the product of its importance and the number of people watching.
* Strobes only explode when lots of people are watching.
Corollary:
Strobes only work when there is nobody else to see.
The last six laws and corollaries were sent by Jason Antman

2008-02-21T23:33:00.000-08:00

It seems like everything I touch just falls to pieces
It seems like everyone I help just falls
And how I need someone to make me feel assured
I don't need anyone if You're on my side, Lord

And I say, hey, who can be against me?

No matter how hard I try I always fail
I'll never be like Christ
I know I'll struggle until the day, the very day I die
And how I need someone to make me feel assured
I don't need anyone if You're on my side, Lord

And I say, hey, who can be against me?

God look at me, I'm just a man
But You tell me I'm not just a man
You're so hard to understand, after all I'm just a man
God you tell me not to doubt
But I'm always plagued by doubt
And You always help me out
I'm so ashamed (of my doubt)

so i have probably heard this song a thousand times. yet it still gets me. to the core it gets me. Especially that last part. I still have a hard time putting all of me into Christs saving grace i want to do it on my own. but i know i cannot. its hard i have relied on myself for so very long, i had to grow up pretty dang fast, i had to understand life too soon i think, i had a bastard of a stepdad he made sure of it, i dont feel as if i had enough time to just be a kid. i dont know, but i had to mature quickly and so i feel that is why i reject the hardcore maturity that comes with my age (my birthday was yesterday...21 now). its weird though all i want is to put my faith and trust in him unconditionally and i know i can i just cant let go...suggestions?

so im bored

2008-02-16T19:47:00.000-08:00

Im so bored that i am writing a blog with out a cause, i usually have some life feeling or some super random thought that i want to share with the blogging community but this time im just going to talk. I just really really bored, its summit weekend here at the Cade, and its one of my lest favorite weekends in the lot of them. Punk high schoolers here to take up space. I hate it. all my friends are out whoring themselves the Cade machine, and i am sitting in my room listening to the Lost background menu music...its Hawaiian, speaking of Hawaiian i went to this place in the Clinton District of P-Town called Noho's its was amazing pricey but worth it. Gah im bored want to take some pictures but all my film is gone and i dont want to spend money on that right now. gah i want to blow up. thats it i guess. call me...

so i might get cynical...

2008-02-08T23:41:00.000-08:00

Where does the misunderstanding come from,
demanding that we be outstanding and then some?
Perfection never was a requirement
although some might say we desired it.
So then for times when things get old I might get cynical
I see that I don't see.
Do they see you when they see me?

In honesty there's room for improvement
Thoughts may change, the truth be told,
A closed mind will leave you empty
Use your mind to use your soul.

Alert the press, their dogmas are a mess,
Opinions shift, a broken sift, an empty hand,
And billboards ask, 'where do they stand.'
Do all streams lead to one sea?

Logically there's room for all questions
Though the answers aren't all known,
Objectivities the myth of plenty,
Who doubt His truth within their soul.

I have a Dream...

2008-02-04T00:18:00.000-08:00

so I haven't blogged in a very very long time. But anyways, So I'm in a place where I feel everything is fine. But I also have this eerie feeling this is just the calm before the storm. I don't know why I am so paranoid but I am. I also feel a bit lost at times, like I've loved being away for so long I don't know how to react to genuine people because I haven't seen them in so long. People really are lame, people will really let you down no matter what. I understand why God wants us to lean on Him and not on ourselves or others because we are bound to letting people down. I don't know anymore World Wide Web people suck, I have known this for a very very long time but I guess I still let myself hope that this world isn't as terrible as I see it, but then again I am let down. I do not understand people and their pettiness, why "Men" act like bitches, why "Women" are so snide behind each other, how people can just give up on dreams. Is this what we grew up so fast for? Is this really it? I can not believe that, for some reason I believe there is more. I really believe there really is more to me than there really is to me. (cheesy I know but move on.) There are no words to describe how scary that is to me, a life of monotony (<---I had to look that up to make sure I was using it right) God himself didnt want this for us, he gave us the spirit of desire for freedom and if we dont have it we go crazy and really lose sight of Him. I vow here and now not to let the pettiness of people the snideness of peoples pride and the deterioration of dreams contaminate my life. I will not sit to talk about differences in personality I will live mine, if I choose to not care about something let me not care, I dont make you, I will argue till the cows come home with you about it but will I care...no and i love it. ATTENTION TO THOSE WHO HAVE LOST SIGHT OF YOUR DREAMS...YOU POOR POOR FOOLS EMBRACE AND ACCEPT THEM FOR YOU LIVE BUT ONCE AND AT THEN END WHEN ALL IS SAID AND DONE AND YOU STAND BEFORE GOD AND ASKS HOW YOU LIVED YOUR LIFE FOR HIM YOU CAN SAY FULFILLED. Dream people just Dream

Hey Folks!

2007-11-15T09:35:00.000-08:00

So i know i haven't blogged in a while, school and stuff really does hinder it. But hey life is life right. Well so here i am Logan gave me the morning off i need to study for my 20th century Europe test tomorrow (amazing class by the way). But yeah life is good. I started to get past the thing that kept me so angry and hurt this last year. im getting to the point of not really caring, which i think is the healthiest. My favorite person in the world was here for the weekend and i got to spend a bunch of time with him talking and just being. the same thoughts and jokes that go through his head also go through mine, weird thing is, is that he is generation older than me. I think we remind each other of ourselves. I really have a place with him where ever we are. he has a dream for me that is scary, but in reality that dream keeps creeping up on me. Yeah i don't know. i get to go home this weekend for about a week for Thanksgiving. I think its a bit ironic that my Dads family celebrates Thanksgiving, it kinda brings up harsh feelings for natives you would think but i think we like turkey and mashed potatoes and gravy too much to give up the tradition. So heres the thing i cant respect someones authority when they are forced into a position and they know that they probably cant handle it. there is a Elton John song that helps me explain it actually heres a lyric

Don't give us none of your aggravation
We had it with your discipline
Saturday night's alright for fighting
Get a little action in

I cant not help but fight against it, its who i am if i didn't i wouldn't be me.

and who wouldn't want that?

go ahead and argue and we will see what comes of it.

yeah thats it

2007-09-26T19:36:00.000-07:00

i'm on a private helicopter with my favorite ex-girlfriend
tiny little cabin in the sky
now we're alone and we can remember how we felt before we were angry:

we were guilty and we were bitter
(I must admit I said a few things, but...)

i'm still attracted to you
sorry we've been so cold, so
eight miles high and three hours to landing,
god, your hair smells really great

i'm on a hovercraft to Paris with my former best friend
we have to get to the cinematheque
we're not alone but no one speaks english, so we're free
to look into each other's minds
and see what we're thinking like we always used to

i miss talking to you
but you never draw me out so
cast off the ego scars and let's go hit the bars

i reserve the right to hold my grudges
friends like you, you know the rest
but all told, i hold on to my anger far too long
until it's a joke
the night is cold
the joke is old
(and poorly told, i told you once)

i'm on a private helicopter with my favorite ex-girlfriend,
no one to keep up appearances for
now we're alone and we can remember how we felt at first;
the desperate need to be together
must've been good for something, sugar

i'm still attracted to you
no one's making

yet another song...they are good songs shut up

2007-09-19T01:51:00.000-07:00

There's just two ways to lose yourself in this life
And neither way is safe
In my dreams I see visions of the future
But today we have today
And where will I find You?

In the economy of mercy
I am a poor and begging man
In the currency of Grace
Is where my song begins
In the colors of Your goodness
In the scars that mark your skin
In the currency of Grace
Is where my song begins

These carbon shells
These fragile dusty frames
House canvases of souls
We are bruised and broken masterpieces
But we did not paint ourselves
And where will I find You?

Where was I when the world was made?
Where was I?

I'm lost without You here
Yes, I'm lost without You near me
I'm lost without You here
You knew my name when the world was made

Two in one night

2007-09-13T00:24:00.000-07:00

Can you count all the things that I'm worried about
By the lines in my brow, I want to trust but don't know how
To rest and be still, to abandon myself to your will
And I can't figure out what my time in this world is about

And this time I don't have an answer
But don't think that I haven't tried
I still have the heart of a seeker
But I need the faith of a child
I need the faith of a child

I know Christ waits for me on the other side
of this life, But I, I wanna know why I'm alive
Cause I wonder from the path so far
Would it be easier, easier to be where you are

And this time I don't have an answer
But don't think that I haven't tried
I still have the heart of a seeker
But I need the faith of a child
I need the faith of a child

I wanna know what the truth is
and I don't care if its costly
I know there must be a reason
even if it cannot be known by me

And this time I don't have an answer
But don't think that I haven't tried
I still have the heart of a seeker
But I need the faith of a child

I need the faith of a child

so its about this girl

2007-09-12T23:53:00.000-07:00

I don't even know what to say man. I'm at a loss, we were brothers for two years, now you're like a distant second cousin, whom i might see at family banquets. You aren't around. You have a busy schedule as do i. I have to keep my grades up cause its one of the two places i see you, in meetings that is. meetings is that were brothers are supposed to meet? i don't think so...i remember that i would be so excited at evening times cause me you and our other brother who has left us for another school who is getting freakin' married...just simply hangin' with you was something that got me through last year, from my dealings with that whore of an ex, to some weird depression thing. you were there, but now where are you...with her...always...homework...club...her...what about that guy who took what he saw in you and did everything in his power to earn trust and friendship from you...and you from him...? where has it all gone? I'm tired. these first few weeks have sucked with out you to go on adventures and fight with. let alone just chill with...

thats all i got..

i sound like a little girl...

Pray Hard and Hold on to Jesus

Monday at 3:30

2007-09-10T15:24:00.000-07:00

So yeah, Ive finished almost all of my homework for this weekend. I have a bit of reading to do for Reed and Williamson's classes tomorrow but other than that i am feeling rather accomplished for this week. I am uber excited about our meeting, i would tell you but you aren't a Kingsmen...well you are, but not you. We have a week until Rush week, and two weeks until Pledge week. WE are really picking everything up from now until the end of the semester. Heres a link to the Kingsmen website via Cascade. (it hasn't been updated since it was made...) But yeah im active and i am an officer this year. It is going to be great. I am learning things that apply to my major and i am finally loving school. Lets all hope this lasts as long as i am here right.

Pray Hard and Hold On to Jesus

My First Week

2007-09-01T13:14:00.000-07:00

Good morning folks.
i haven't posted in about 10 days. But its understandable because i started school this week. i am now going to go through my schedule and you are going to have to deal with it. On Mondays and Thursdays i don't have to be up until Chapel which is nice, oh wait, i do have to get up. i have to work Cascade Facility Maintenance, but it is fun. My first class is yearbook, fun class but a lot of work. Then i have Personal Spiritual Development with Bill Hunt, this is going to be a great class, its going to teach us how to be spiritual...i guess. No its showing us how to grow in our spiritual lives as Christians. On Tuesdays and Fridays i have at 8am 20th Century European History with Dr. Williamson, its basically a WWII class, like 4 weeks of the origins of the war and the rest of the semester is spent studying WWII. Then i go to chapel and lunch then at 1pm i go to Zoology lecture class, it seems like an interesting class, some of it seems a bit like Environmental Science. then at 230 i have my second favorite class Gospel of John with Kevin Reed. it was the second day yesterday and i seriously already let enlightened. Oh and then on Wednesday i have an 8am PE class and then a 3 hour lab for Zoology. This seems like its going to be a great semester for me. I also think i am going to change my emphasis in my IDS to Bible Missions and History. Gah i don't know again i think this is the path in my life that God has lead me down. So i uh cried already this week and made another person cry at the same thing. I have been asked about my PERSEVERE bracelet that i wear and try to raise awareness for Neimann-Picks Disease. Ive had the honor of being able to Tell E'Trece's story about twice and i haven't be able make it through with out crying...oh well

heres the link to the Neimann-Picks Disease National Foundation

PERSEVERE...

Pray Hard and Hold On to Jesus

This one is for all the suckers who still believe in LOVE

2007-08-23T17:39:00.000-07:00

Hey everybody I’ve got somethin’ to tell it's what I learned from relationship hell
Lust turns to disgust a heart of gold into rust a soft touch to a slap in the
face- it gets old it goes away

This one's for all the suckers who still believe in love, this one's for you.
This one’s for all the suckers who still believe in love, this one’s for you.
It never works but we keep tryin' like fools learning and breaking the rules
At first you're excited then you're less than delighted by the end you wish
they would drop dead it can't last, it's gone so fast

This one's for all the suckers who still believe in love, this one's for you
This one’s for all the suckers who still believe in love, this one’s for you...

CHEER UP?

kind of a downer day

2007-08-22T00:10:00.000-07:00

i dont have much to say today. Hutch and i had one amazing adventure to the storage unit, but were then turned away by the coded door. We need to make a payment on the unit or we cant get our stuff its lame but i understand. I find myself alone a lot this week, even when i am surrounded by the people i love and admire most i still feel a bit alone, and i know its really the frenzy of the first week back for everyone and we are all crazy its just that i want so much more with stuff right now and i cant have it. im being very selfish and i know Gods perfect timing is what i need to hold on to but yeah. my friend is moving to a far off land i am so going to miss her, i wish i could have told her the things that ive wanted for so long but havent had the guts too. well here it is. YOURE FREAKING AMAZING, I WISH I COULD HAVE TOLD YOU EVERY SINGLE TIME I SAW YOU...yeah she leaves this week for a long time fare thee well i shall for ever cherish the times we spent in the elevator...good night

Pray Hard and Hold on to Jesus

The Cade....

2007-08-20T19:33:00.000-07:00

There is something different about cascade this year. Ive been here 2 and a 1/2 days so far, but for some reason i feel different. I see all these new freshman, and old faces, i for some reason feel older. Much older. i have never really ever felt this way before. i am not sure how i feel about this. i know growing up is a part of life...is it my turn? there are many things that scare me about this. but then again they are so extremely exciting. i don't know. 300 is playing behind me. yeah. there are so many faces that make me happy to be back here. and yet there are a few that tear my heart apart. if you are one of those people im sorry for whatever it is that ive done, but im really not to blame here. thats all im going to say. this year is going to be interesting. I just opened a package of Wonka Bottle Caps, i always forget that i love them: i think thats how i feel about the cade. i always forget that i love this place more than i think i do. its still early and 300 is on. so peace out for now

Pray hard and Hold on to Jesus

Seprated at Birth

2007-08-17T17:13:00.000-07:00

His name is travis,
he has many alias' such as The Thum, T-Rav, Trav, those are just a few. He is the guy you go to when you need to know something about The Jurassic Period...actually you could ask him about any of those periods he'll hook you up with some random knowledge and he will even tell you about how we once ran around and acted as dinosaurs in elementary school at that place we have come to love Shasta. Since 1st grade this guy has been by my side. Hes my best friend. We've made some kick a movies and some pretty dumb ones, he loves Godzilla and his dog max ( coolest dog ever) this is him!

Michael Savage gets it...

2007-08-17T17:08:00.000-07:00

[IF]

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!

--Rudyard Kipling

Today is...

2007-08-17T16:34:00.000-07:00

the final day i am at the church until i come back for Thanksgiving. Looking back at this summer it has had so many "up" days i cant really remember any "downers". Ive spent many days with close good friends, i have to say in your face Brian Simmons the friends i had in high school and i are still as close as ever. Death will be the only thing could possibly end this friendship. I for the last month have almost been dreading going back to the Cade, different reasons, but after attending the elders meeting this last Tuesday, i realized that any fears or apprehensions ive had are just things that will try and keep me off my walk to my ultimate goal...finishing the race. i find this passage in the bible so cool. Acts 20:24 says "However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace." this life i have chosen well i guess our Father has chosen is so exciting and scary at the same time...i dont know im kinda rambling. This summer has been great being able to work with the youth and going to Tuba and to SBC are allows super huge blessings for me, this race im on is a lonely one right now, but He continues to strengthen me and i feel it at the most perfect of times...

thats all i got God's timing is perfect. His path for me is Perfect...but still i ask for more..im an idiot

Pray hard and Hold on to Jesus